.~*`Raindance`*~.: May 2006

freewriting...

is a technique to see what's up in someone's head. Perhaps it's a good release for some, and reveal issues that may lie in the subconcious. So I decided to try it out one day...to write continuously for 15 minutes without stopping...pen down every thought that comes. To my surprise, I found 15 questions directed at God and myself, 10 negative emotions revealed, and only 3 positive emotions identified. Hmm...that's not a good state to be in.

Good intentions mean nothing...I can intend to do good...but can go and do evil instead. The tongue is the source of much evil...and I refuse to be the hearer and bearer of empty words. That is why I may not be speaking up much these days. I may have deceived myself once again of who God is, and that really sucks. I've hit rock bottom, and have come to the end of myself. And I cry out "Change my heart O God, make it ever true. Change my heart O God, may I be like You."

I believe that this is a crucial process of every believer to go through. To go through fire and testing, so that we can come out clean, refined, whole, and new.

Thanks grace. I think I know which statement's for me. Try this...10 statements for 10 ppl...but for whatever reason have not expressed it to them.

1. Do you know how blessed you are?
2. I want to be more like you.
3. It's amazing how far you've come.
4. Are you trying to hurt me intentionally?
5. Life is hard...stop complaining...and realize God's truth!
6. Juice will make you fat, just like pop.
7. I gave up my full house to let you win that poker round. ;)
8. Sometimes I want to shake sense into you.
9. You got yourself into it...can't blame anyone else.
10. Love you. It's been a real blessing having you here.